Latest Threat to Mullah World: Exploding Rocks

Ah, the Islamic Republic of Iran, where everyone except the nuclear physicists and rocket scientists is a product of several generations of first-cousin marriages.

Last year, a couple of their nuclear-weapons-base guards found a suspicious-looking rock adjacent to their voice and data cables. When they tried to handle it, it did a most unrocklike thing: it blew up.

Tentative conclusion: a foreign intelligence service’s bug just self-destructed.

Iran’s Revolutionary Guard troops were inspecting data and telephone links to the Fordo nuclear facility in August when they found the rock, tried to move it and saw it explode, intelligence sources told the Sunday Times, according to Al Arabiya.

The ‘rock’ was able to intercept computer data from the facility, the newspaper reported on Sunday, citing those who surveyed parts of the device after the explosion.

They’re still a little bent out of shape about the whole “exploding” thing. Nothing’s supposed to explode unless the Supreme Leader says so, dammit.

(Idle question: is there a relationship between quality of governance in a nation, and presence of some dude, invariably dressed real funny, who styles himself “Supreme Leader”? And is that relationship inverse?)

The U.N. and western powers suspect Iran’s nuclear program is intended for the creation of weapons, but Iran insists it is for peaceful purposes.

Yeah, but their definition of “peaceful” is reenacting the Final Solution with hydrogen bombs.

The Fordo facility, near Qoms, is currently enriching uranium to a level close to the amount used in nuclear weapons, the Associated Press reports.

via Spy device disguised as rock reportedly explodes outside Iranian nuclear facility | Fox News.

They’re so keen on nuclear materials over there. Well, at the rate they’re going, they’re going to get plenty. Which is definitely going to be one of those, “Be careful what you ask for, because…” moments.

20 thoughts on “Latest Threat to Mullah World: Exploding Rocks

  1. bobby b

    I’m guessing that if they could have captured it intact and questioned it, it would have spoken with an Israeli accent.

  2. jim h

    think we, er, somebody, can somehow put a bunch of them in the homes of the “leadership” over there? like alarm clocks or something. that’d solve some headaches for everyone…

  3. Sommerbiwak

    Apart from the line being bugged, which bugs them mightily. Now a hunt for the contacts within Iran that have put the explodey device there is going to start.

  4. LFMayor

    Was it the Iranians that shot some birds as “spies” a few years back, or was it a similar but nearby pestilential shithole?

    1. gebrauchshund

      Well now that would just be silly. They did in fact arrest several squirrels for spying in 2007, but we all know what squirrels are like. I don’t know how the little tree rats made out at trial.

  5. Aesop

    Cue the next round of spontaneous combustion (at 30K fps) of another couple of dozen nuclear experts there.

    Don’tcha hate it when that happens?

  6. Badger

    Now having them make an Angleton-like scouring of the environs surrounding all their facilities is just a perk.

  7. S

    Well, the koran does claim that in the end time rocks will call to muslims that there is a Jew hiding behind them, come kill him…..this may be a Cunning Plan by the Jews to inoculate the doughty warriors of the prophet (ptui! clang!). That reminds me, must learn to chew baccy and spit like Josey Wales; might come in handy.

  8. Y.

    The U.N. and western powers suspect Iran’s nuclear program is intended for the creation of weapons, but Iran insists it is for peaceful purposes.

    Perhaps they’ve been inspired by that SAC motto : “Peace is our profession”.

    After seeing what US Army did to Saddam, and what happened to Qaddaffi, they’d be insane not to get a bomb.

  9. staghounds

    Papen, Boy-Ed, and their accomplices tried to place lumps of fake coal full of explosives in British ship bunkers in 1914-18.

  10. John Distai

    As a teenager, I had tons of fun sneaking around, “improvising” items, and creating mischief. If only I knew then that I could make a living by combining my surveillance, craftsmanship, and pyrotechnic skills.
    Another missed opportunity.

  11. Keith

    I’ve always been impressed by the quality of the commenters on this site. That is until Haxo Angmark showed up, spewing his anti-semitism continually.

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