Are You on ISIL’s List?

List-Home-banner-1You know, that list of 8,000 names they’ve instructed their splodydopes, machete-meisters and generally murderous mohammedrones to go kill?

CounterJihad claims to have a copy of the list. You can go to this link and enter your name and email, and if Hadji has spelled your name right, when he put you on the list, they’ll give you an up, and instructions on how to request an update from the Sword and Shield of The Party the partisan political police previously known as the FBI.

CounterJihad reports:

ISIS has released another kill list of people with names and addresses it says it has targeted. This list contains over 8,000 names worldwide and more than 4000 Americans.

The FBI is investigating the list but has not at this point notified the people included on it.

We have a copy of the list that law enforcement is using. We cannot vouch for the accuracy of the list, or the ability of ISIS to deliver on their threats– but we do think it is fair for Americans to know if they are listed and be able to query the FBI as to the status of the investigation.

They’re also using the list request as a way to sign you up for their emails. We signed up because we’re interested in the civilizational jihad that they report on.

To our great disappointment, we were not on the list. We’re going to have to redouble our efforts.

28 thoughts on “Are You on ISIL’s List?

  1. Winston Smith

    “To our great disappointment, we were not on the list. We’re going to have to redouble our efforts.”

    I had that feeling too.

  2. Docduracoat

    Everyone is on that list
    They plan to kill everyone in the world who is not a Sunni Moslem
    Jews and Christians are supposed to be given a chance to convert to Sunni Islam
    All Shiites and Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs, Confucians, Shinto and New Agers are to be killed
    That is a lot of killing they plan on doing

    1. Hognose Post author

      They better pack extra falafel, eh?

      They’ve been exterminating the Jews since Mohammed had a carbon footprint, and yet, behold, Jews. I suspect that if the Elders of Zion (if there were such a thing, which there ain’t) got to pick their people’s would-be exterminators, they’d certainly pick Arabs and Moslems. It’s practically a guarantee of long life and prosperity!

  3. John M.

    Did you try “Hognose” as well as your given name? It’s sufficiently haram that they might’ve gone with that. Plus your given name isn’t easy to figure out from here if it’s this blog that bothers them.

    -John M.

    1. Hognose Post author

      The Taliban had a price on my head, but it was only $6,000. The Ecuadorian ELN and Colombia FARC had offered $50k some ten years earlier. In the first case, nobody wanted to try, apparently (a number of us had the same bounty on our heads, but nobody wanted to try us on for a payday he might not live to collect).

      In the South American case, my Bolivian counterpart explained that everybody knew the terrorists were too broke to actually pay. “If anybody thought they had the money, it would be different; hell, I’d do you myself.” Gee, thanks, Rios.

      1. Ti

        South America? – I gots to ask sir: Did you ever see a LaFrance/Smith M14K in your southern american countries tour by chance?

  4. ToastieTheCoastie

    Maaaan if a guy was on this list he could sure leverage it into a good brag when picking up girls.

  5. SPEMack

    Damn it! I’m not in there either.

    What the he’ll do I have an AR-15 for then?

    1. Winston Smith

      “What the he’ll do I have an AR-15 for then?”
      Enemies, Foreign and DOMESTIC.

  6. morokko

    Setting up this kind of webpage with supposed kill list check could be nice way to aggregate actual mailing list for marketing – or perhaps other – purposes. Vanity is dangerous thing.

    1. DSM

      In other news…. ISIL expands targeting list via website to check if you’re on their targeting list. Haha!

      1. morokko

        Little bit of paranoia is beneficial for the overall health. And there are medications in case of paranoia overdose ( although Russians would argue if someone could be too paranoid for his own good). Cross checking submissions to this kind of webpage with other possible lists could give its handler interesting crumbs of information.

  7. Air

    Could’ve warned me to use a real email address. Oh well, let’s see if I get new Facebook friends request from whom ever the negative results went to and I hope they like being on that email list.

    1. John M.

      Avoid “friend” or other connection requests on social media from profiles that have profile pictures of attractive women. Unless you know said attractive woman, of course.

      -John M.

  8. whomever

    “To our great disappointment, we were not on the list.”

    ISIL was going to put you on their list, but then they cross checked and saw you were on the No-Fly list, and figured they must be wrong about you.

    “If anybody thought they had the money, it would be different; hell, I’d do you myself.”

    If your friends won’t double cross you, who will?

      1. morokko

        But then you would be upset and disappointed in their friendship – I think real friends – that is if they are true ones – should always stab in the back. Wouldnt it be nicer for Brutus to put the stiletto into his mentor back to spare him disillusionment in his last minute of life? Poor fellow would die a little bit happier man.

  9. TBoone

    We are ALL on the menu at the Al Hulu Snackbar. It matters not to me if’n they name a Sandwich after me and put it at the top of the menu.

    IF I don’t get the menu tribute? Perhaps more time to train…..

    And ‘they’ may, or may not, be on “my” list. The lack of clarity/importance may just lead to hurt feels. They do so seem to be all prickly about their feels…

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